Unpaved path ahead

I am a detail oriented person. I like to have a plan, know what I am doing, make lists, and move forward with some idea of what I am getting myself into to a degree. However, this past school year really threw me in a loop. Staff difficulties, extreme weather, severe challenges at work, and life really threw me in a loop. While I knew it would be difficult to be in the midst of unpredictability; life still had somewhat of a road map. It was predictable, it was routine, and it now is in the past.

A little over a month ago, I was asked to interview for a new position that would be created in m a district closer to family. I felt the interview went well and then I waited. The next Monday, the director of special ed called me herself and offered me the position as a Self Contained behavior unit teacher. In early May, I signed my letter of intent and I submitted by contract to the new district this week and resigned from my current district as well.

FB announcement

There are a lot of unknowns, such as what school I will be at (since the unit is being created based on district need), what types of behaviors and needs my students will have, and what the age range will be in my classroom. This is an unpaved path so to speak. I know behavior(s) and love the challenge. But not knowing the details has been tough. They will come in time but, for now, I will wait.

It was an extremely tough decision to leave my comfort zone, staff, and my students. I will miss them daily. I am extremely grateful for technology to stay connected as well. However, it is time. Time to have the opportunity to serve other students. Time to help students thrive and be supported in a safe environment. Time to start a new adventure and time to face the unpaved path ahead.

 

Uncharted waters…move forward

A plan: An idea of how one perceives how something will go in life. 
Reality: What really happens once a plan is moved forward.

This year started out like any other. New students, new rooms, new year. Hurricane Harvey then shattered much of South Texas and the community and world pitched in to help evacuate, rescue, and rebuild. It still gives me chills in May. The daily sirens, alerts, and helicopter sounds still make me pause when I hear them today. Ten days of hurricane Harvey’s destruction and rebuilding brought people back together and made many, including myself, grateful for what I had. People went back to life as they could and school started after two weeks of seeing devastation and destruction hit many.

The year continued. People rebuilt, people supported the Hurricane victims, and our students continued to come each day. Our students craved the stability, consistency, and structure of what we provide each day. While our personal lives may have been through so much, we had to put on a brave face and be there, all in, for our students. It was one of the hardest things working through the emotions, roadblocks, and devastation much of the area received. Our students saw too much, noticed the fears and struggles, and then came back craving their routine and stability. The back to school a second time was more challenging than the first. Our students struggled. They had been watching the devastation hit and then were thrown back into the demands of academics.

School continued, report cards went home, and we were back on track or so it seemed. 

Our students had to adjust as did the teachers. They had been home engulfed in emotions and fear. Fear presents in many ways. However, our students had so much more baggage then than in the beginning. The practice of building the culture began. Our students were given the chance to process, vent, explain, and had a way to express themselves. It was eye opening. It was changing. It was needed.

This year has not been easy by any means. From turmoil to difficulties, I truly am grateful for the intertwined lessons the challenges brought. There have been many support sessions, questions asked, and I am extremely grateful for my team. I can ask a question, receive the support, and move forward. It’s a plan I had no idea I needed but, in reality, is something that was meant to be.

Aside from the natural disasters and the aftermath, my journey with my students this year has been difficult. It’s not something I will air completely. But it has had many factors and trials along the way. The daily stress and difficulties this year have made me reevaluate what my purpose is as an educator and where I can serve students to the fullest capacity. An easy decision to move closer to family and the most difficult was to leave the students I have invested in for four years has been heart-wrenching. However, it’s time for a change. A path of new direction. A need to serve other students in a different capacity. My reality unknown but uncharted waters await.

Something the Hurricane and aftermath taught me was things don’t go our way for long. It’s the nature of the existence. We plan, life happens. We move forward & accept what comes our way. It’s not something you can mourn. It’s something you can accept.

This year has been full of many, many trials and our plan does not always go as planned. Reality is, however, there’s a lesson in each journey. A journey of uncharted waters untouched and just waiting for someone to use.

Uncharted waters

 

The greatest compliment

My brother is a man of few words. Although he doesn’t always tell me what’s on his mind (but getting better), he still makes my heart crumble and melt when he does.

My brother and I have a special bond. We both endured many struggles with learning ideas, concepts, and topics growing up and needed a lot of support to be successful. Those trials were both good and bad but he and I overcame and struggled to be successful today. He is the complete opposite of me. I am type A and very organized. He doesn’t mind not knowing when specific things will occur and is extremely laid back (I wish I could be). He listens to everything others say but doesn’t always respond. I, on the other hand, can talk to anyone. He is black and white (not grey at all) and I see the in between.

He makes my heart swell as he’s currently a Senior at the University of Arkansas. Of all the majors in the world, he’s studying English. It’s amazing to me since we both have Dyslexia and struggled and still struggle with learning. When he talks, we listen. He can write the most eloquent posts and it’s always interesting to read.

This afternoon, my brother gave me the greatest and unexpected compliment. As he was heading out to see friends and I would be leaving our family home to go back to the town I work in, he said,

“I’m proud of what you do and tell everyone. You have the patience to work with your students. I don’t always tell you how much I admire your work but I do.”

My heart melted. My brother doesn’t always express himself with many words but this was the best gift ever to me. Memories last a lifetime and my brother’s gift with words and compliment will be ingrained in my memory for a lifetime. I am grateful for such a great brother and look up to him (literally) for his wisdom and grace. I am grateful for his unexpected compliment and will hold this memory and compliment dear and near to my heart.